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Thursday, May 19, 2011

These Are Not Your Daddy's Dating Lessons [article from Articleranks]

These Are Not Your Daddy's Dating Lessons


Your dad grew up in the right time. He and your mom may have met in high school or college, before getting married after the courtship stage. It may have been very common in his time, but not so in our generation. The possibilities after graduation are unlimited compared to our parents' time.

The old connections aren't in place the way they used to be and modern dating has taken on a whole new face. Besides that, it's a very rare occurrence, at least in western societies, for people to get married and start families at extremely young ages.

Many years ago, the status quo was for a man to marry his girlfriend by the time he graduated high school or college, oftentimes before reaching 20. Not so common in today's world. We (meaning both men and women) want to get through college and maybe grad school, head to parts unknown during our young years to explore and see the world. We also prefer to get a decent job before settling down, and may change jobs a few times before doing so.

We want choices. Still, that doesn't exactly mean that Mom and Dad didn't have their own choices to make. But back in their time, there was no such thing as the Internet, and traveling the world for romance wasn't as popular as it is nowadays. Now let's return back to what you want. You're looking for Ms. Right, and you're wondering where and how to find her.

That being said, you need to have an idea about how today's dating culture works. Maybe you already do, but this refresher can help you avoid being awkward or geeky, because these are two things women can find cute initially, but not in the long run.

But what if you have zero confidence whatsoever? You have to reach deep inside and project confidence even if it's not what your mind is telling you that you're feeling. You'll learn to be confident in your dating skills as you test the dating waters.

Being confident in who you are means being confident in being yourself. Cockiness is a totally different thing all together, and something to avoid. Cockiness is totally different from confidence, and women like one of these two virtues and get turned off by the other - no prizes if you guess the right answer.

How is it these days in today's dating environment? TV and movies tell us one thing - that dating is all about hanging out at the bar, drinking beers or martinis while flirting with women whose attire leaves little to the imagination. Nice idea, but seriously, for most people it's not like that.

Dating doesn't have to involve drinking and partying at the club, as you can go to other venues any time of the day you wish. If your date doesn't like going out at night, or doesn't dig the party scene like you do, you can take her to a sports event or to the local community center.

You can take your date to so many places in the day time - to the coffee shop near the office, or even at the airport before your flight takes off. Yes, you can meet interesting people to talk to, women in particular, at the airport or at work, or just about anywhere in today's hectic society. Maybe even in another city all together!

Women these days are interested in more than just movies and dinner - you can take them to a basketball or hockey game and expect them to have a fun time rooting for the home team with you. You don't need to follow any specific rules aside from the common sense ones - today's dating scene is so much different from the way it was in your dad's time.

You need to learn to always be ready and think on your feet. New possibilities can present themselves to you in a split second. You have to be prepared to think out of the box and step out of the familiar routine.

But what if your date is an epic failure? So what? The more you fail, the better chances you'll have of succeeding. You'll only find yourself on the losing end if you lose confidence and stop trying, so there's nothing to lose if you keep on practicing. Your next date could be the woman you meet at the gym, or in the elevator or at the bookstore. You need to be ready.

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